Tag: self-love

Accept Correction

Posted on by Admin VGC

Have you ever been in a situation where you found yourself having a hard time accepting other people’s comments?

Comments are not always criticisms. In the same way, criticisms are not always meant to be negative. These can actually help you correct and improve yourself or your work. 

As humans, our pride and our ego makes it sometimes hard to hear that we may have made a mistake or may have been lacking in some part. It is especially hard to hear when we are actually expecting praise or a reward for what we have done. When this happens, disappointment often follows; but the Bible reminds us of the importance of having to accept correction.

 

The ear that hears the rebukes of life

Will abide among the wise.

He who disdains instruction despises his own soul,

But he who heeds rebuke gets understanding.

-Proverbs 15:31-32

 

When it comes to our spiritual life, God has given us a guide to equip us for our time here on earth. He has given us the Scriptures, which serve to bring us instruction and correction, for our own great benefit.

 

All Scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, thoroughly equipped for every good work.

-2 Timothy 3:16-17 (NKJV)

 

To accept correction is to allow ourselves to be better individuals, both in the eyes of man and in the eyes of God. 

 

Pray with me:

Dear Lord, 

Thank you, Father, for your unfailing love. You have made us and you continue to guide us through the Holy Spirit and the Scriptures. Thank you for illuminating our minds through your divine Word. Fill our hearts, our minds, our spirits, with your grace. May we be recipients of your heavenly inspirations and be living examples of your great glory. Amen. 

 

How Important is Virginity to you?

Posted on by vestella

Men and women nowadays who have sex regularly are bothered and concerned with pregnancy. If you value your virginity, you won’t think of this possible consequence that you, your partner, your family and other people around you will be affected. You won’t worry about finances, emotional needs and other concern that you need to consider when this thing happened.

And because of no other obligations, you may enjoy your time with your family and friends. You may still continue to enjoy the season of being independent.

Free from any Sickness and Disease

Purity is healthy. If you are a virgin, you are free from any sexually transmitted disease such as HIV / AIDS, herpes, genital warts, syphilis, and gonorrhea. Don’t you think that it feels so good that you are free from any sickness that may bring to you by having sex to anyone outside marriage? You are not just protecting yourself from the disease but also your future spouse and children. It will be an honor to see your spouse and kids healthy. A reward that is priceless.

Preserving your Virginity Frees You from Emotional Trauma

If you are a virgin, you have protected yourself from pains, trauma, shame, heartache, and guilt. You are free from the bondage. Those bondages may not help you enjoy your relationship with your spouse on your marriage. Being a virgin will make your self-esteem high and have your own self-pride.

Being a virgin gives you freedom from any insecurity. It gives you such confidence of your value and worth. Knowing that you have not made any soul ties to anyone, you will be free enjoying the relationship you will have with your spouse.

Happy Marriage

I believe it is everybody’s dream to be happily married. And when you obey God, to wait in His time and preserve your virginity until marriage, you are securing yourself the place of God’s blessings. God intends for you to be happy in marriage. As you obey and honor Him, He will never fail to bless you in your marriage life. And when He blesses something, He doesn’t add any trouble to it. 1 Believe and have faith.

Most of the women feel very special when they know that their men would wait for them. And most men prefer to marry a virgin. Imagine if you two waited and trusted God for His time to do sex inside marriage. Imagine yourself, giving your all and your best to that someone who deserves the gift of virginity. No ties and unpleasant memories in your mind. It will only be you and your spouse. That will be so beautiful.

Thoughts to Ponder to Over

Is your virginity important to you? Do you want to be happy with your sex life in your marriage? Are you willing to take the risk to experience emotional trauma? Why or why not?

Have Accountability Over Your Body

Posted on by vestella

Having accountability doesn’t only mean struggling alone because we often need someone we can talk to. Let’s admit it, we can’t always thrive in life alone.  It’s best that you have a person you can be accountable to. You need someone to talk to. Someone you are not afraid to approach but at the same time may have authority over you. Look for someone you can fully trust and whom you can say exactly the things you are struggling with.

Talk to someone you are comfortable to share what is needed to share. Your accountability to that person doesn’t mean you need to say all the details of your life. Identify what are the things necessary to tell to that person so that he/she may help you to overcome such struggle.

Talk to Someone Who Fears God

Make sure that you are talking to a person who fears God. This is important because wisdom comes from those who fear God. And that is what we need – wise counsel. Also, you may be accountable not just to one. It can be more than one person as long as you know that this person is someone you can trust and has a relationship with God.

A person who has a relationship with God will push you to pursue purity and holiness. He/she will pray with you, correct you and rebuke you if needed. Your accountability partner will help you to mirror yourself. He/she will tell you what you really need to hear because he/she cares for you.

Know Your Company

The Bible says that bad company destroys your character. If you ask for prayer, advice, help, and counsel; a bad company may not help you with it. Therefore, if you want to be strong and make your convictions intact, surround yourself with people who have a relationship with God.

You can never go wrong with having people who love God around you. It’s one of the best decisions that you could ever make. They will help you to stand still and wait. They will encourage you to preserve your virginity until it’s the right time.

You may also ask Christian people who had mistakes in losing their virginity before marriage. You may learn a lot from them. And they may encourage you more with the difference of giving up your virginity in the bonds of marriage. This will help you not to do the same mistake as they did.

Learn to Listen

Those people whom we are accountable to will not just listen to our cries and concerns. But they will also speak on their behalf. And as they tell us what we need to hear, we should learn how to listen.

It will be good for us to let go of our egos and pride from things we may hear. We need to understand that God sends them to help us walk to glorify Him.

These people’s concern is for us to experience the best things that God has in store for us. If we will trust them, they will help us to stand in our convictions by encouraging us and praying for us.

Doesn’t it feel good that you know there are people who care for you, pray for and encourage you?

Some Thoughts to Ponder Over

Have you looked for a Christian man/woman whom you can be accountable to? Are you still dealing with trust? What do you do about it? If you already have your accountability partner, how does he/she help you now?

Self-Respect Gets You Respect from Others

Posted on by vestella

You must have self-respect in order to earn respect from others. Some people will say, “follow your heart”, when it comes to a relationship. But God’s word tells us not to trust our heart because it is deceitful. Rather, we have to guard it. Most of the time when we trust our heart, we forget to respect ourselves. Especially when emotions and affections start. Our heart influences our actions.

He went on: “It’s what comes out of a person that pollutes: obscenities, lusts, thefts, murders, adulteries, greed, depravity, deceptive dealings, carousing, mean looks, slander, arrogance, foolishness — all these are vomit from the heart. There is the source of your pollution.” -(Mark 7:21, MSG)

Guard our hearts from ungodly emotions, motives and actions. And as we have self-control within us, we will be able to respect ourselves. And as we respect ourselves, we will know how to treat our bodies right before our God. We will preserve our virginity until the right time appointed by God.

Self-Respect in the Form of Honoring God with your Body

Keep God’s word in your heart. This is the best way to keep our way pure. Let’s honor God with our bodies. God is telling us not to allow even a hint of sexual immorality and impurity. With that great motivation, it will make us respect our bodies the way God wants. Always go back to the basics – the word of God.

Sad to say that many people today involve themselves to pre-marital sex. They do it and put their lives to risks. According to some studies, those who engage in premarital sex may experience the risk of many venereal diseases, as well as losing their fertility, AIDS and other common disfiguring diseases like herpes (which has no cure).

If you still have some respect for your body, would you want to have these kinds of sicknesses? Respect yourself. You deserve more than this. God has greater things in store for your life. It’s not about touching fire and testing that we will not get burned.

Understand your Worth

What do you think your worth is? Your worth is for the King of kings to die on the cross for you. You are that important to Him. Your worth is far more than gold or any jewels you may find. Know your deeper value. Do you think you deserve to be happy or not? Do you deserve to suffer from a heart filled with scars or not? You deserve the best.

Once you lose your virginity outside marriage, you are creating soul ties with the person you have engaged sex with. And when you break up. It will create a scar that will break not just your heart but also your character.

Later, when you find your spouse and go to bed with him/her the scar in your heart may affect you and your spouse in your romance. But still, we have a God of wonders. Aside from that, He can heal our hearts.

He can also give us a new one. We don’t know how God will do it to those who lost their virginity. But if you haven’t given up that yet, then you are still blessed to experience the opportunity to experience the best in its time. I encourage you to wait. True love waits.

Do Not Conform

God says in His word that we should not be conformed to the patterns of this world. Don’t mind the people teasing you about your virginity. Don’t be deceived by the lies of you being weak. The more you wait, the more it means you are strong because you are able to stand to your convictions even if it’s so hard.

I want to share a story. There was a girl who was being teased always by her friends about her virginity. They laughed at her and mock her because she is still a virgin. Until one day came that she cannot stand their teasing anymore she went to her friends. And she told them, “You know what? Anytime I want, I can be like you. But anytime you want, you can’t be like me!” Whew! That’s an inspiring story to remember. Isn’t it?

Questions to Ask Yourself

How do you guard your heart? Are you ready to face the consequence of giving your virginity out of marriage bonds?What are some practical steps you may do to respect your body?

Know Your Identity

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It is essential to discover your identity because it helps you set your standards. How do you see yourself? Most of the men and women who have lost their virginity before marriage are victims of peer pressure, broken families, influence of the people that surround them and who experienced rejection. But what is really your identity? Where do you get your identity? Where do you secure yourself?

God says anyone who accepts Christ in his/her life has the right to become His child. You are a child of God. And that is your identity. He is your Father. He loves you so much. And He wants you to have the best. God’s plan for you is to prosper you and not to harm you, to give you hope and a future. His word never fails. The only way to know how much God values us as His child is to know His word. Read the Bible when you have time.

Men and women were created according to God’s image. We reflect some of His attributes. We are fearfully and wonderfully made by Him. Always remind yourself of your value in God’s eyes. He made you unique and one of a kind. And He gave you special gifts such as your virginity to enjoy sex inside His standard – your marriage. He wants you to experience the best sex in your life with the person who will marry you. God knows best.

You Are Accepted

Your virginity matters to God because you are His child. For God so loved us, He gave His one and only Son to redeem our relationship with Him. Imagine the One who created the universe, the stars in the sky and everything you see around you, gave up His life to win back His people.

Imagine how He longs for a relationship with you. That is how valuable you are in His sight. If one of your reasons why you gave up your virginity in the wrong season is because you want to feel accepted by people or by the person you love, remind yourself that you are accepted already by the King of kings.

God Loves You for Your Identity

When you satisfy yourself with the love God offers, you will be fully convinced that giving up your virginity is not the way to be accepted by someone. You are already loved and accepted. You do not need to earn His love. He loves you before you were formed in the womb of your mother. And He has promised us that He loves us with an everlasting love. It never changes through time. His love is forever.

God desires to have a deeper relationship with you. He is concerned in every detail of your life – even in your sex life. He wants you to experience the joy and the delight of sex with your partner who is serious in marrying you and being with you for the rest of your lives.

You will really have a hard time to get what I am saying here if you haven’t experienced the love of God in your life. Let yourself experience His love first. It is a choice. And when you have fully known this well, you will value your virginity and how God, who loves you so much, values you.

Self-Empowerment

Find time to pray and seek God to reveal His love for you. Take time to read your Bible to discover the magnitude of God’s love. Look at the mirror. See yourself and confess to yourself your value in God’s eyes. Declare, “I am valuable!”

Preserve Your Virginity

Posted on by vestella

Preserving your virginity is not only a form of self-love and self-respect, but it is also a way of pleasing God.  Teenagers and adults today are greatly influenced by the media. Most of the time, they offer a different standard of sex. Some practice the “collect-and-select” process to check whom they are compatible with.

Some are just affected by what they see and hear from other people and they do sex just for the fun or experience of it. Sad to say, some do it out of marriage, regardless of whatever the life-long effect or possible consequences it may bring them. But don’t settle for something temporary. You deserve much more.

Set Your Standard

God’s standard is much more different than the world. God made sex to be enjoyed by His creation. He designed it beautifully inside marriage. And your virginity matters before our God. If you are the person who felt like you have lost it already, I am telling you it’s not too late. Virginity is much more than the physical. It also involves mental, spiritual and emotional aspects.

You may regain your virginity. Yes! You may. God says, “Anyone who is in Christ is a new creation. The old has gone and the new has come.”  If you have decided to accept Christ in your life and believe that in your heart, then you are a new person. You can start again with a new life. And as you start now, let’s do some rearrangement of your standards. Not any more of the world’s, but of the Lord’s standards.

Remember, when you are in Christ now, you are turning away from your old self and turning to Him. That means you are no longer a slave of your own desires because you have surrendered yourself to the Lordship of Christ.

Therefore, you may ask the Lord what standards He wants you to set for yourself. But I believe that God’s standard for sex is to be inside the bond of marriage.

The Importance of God’s Standard

People settle for what is available and temporary because they don’t have boundaries for themselves. Even in having sex. Having a set of standards gives you restraint and focus. If you stand for something, you won’t fall for anything. What do you really want? Ask yourself.

Do you really want to lose your virginity outside marriage? Think of the possible consequences that you may face. Again, sex is a gift from God. When not used properly, it may destroy you and the people who are important to you.

Sex, when not used according to God’s standard, may affect not just your relationship with other people, but even your lifestyle. There was a study about young people who engaged in premarital sex. It was observed in the study that it declined their academic performance and destroyed their relationship with their family and friends.

Is that what you think God wants for you? Did God promise to harm you? No. God wants us to enjoy our relationship with Him and with other people. That is why He is serious in telling us to obey Him because He knows fully well the consequences of our sins. Going outside of God’s standards will hurt us. Set your standard in alignment with God’s and it will help you to experience the goodness of sex in His time. Start making a stand now.

Requisites for a Successful Relationship

Posted on by vestella

A successful relationship between a man and a woman involves a lot of factors. Both the man and the woman have equal contributions to it. The most important of these factors is having a proper self-image. A lot of us often overlook this truth. Many fail to realize that the way they see themselves has a huge effect on their relationship.

How Proper Self-Image Builds a Successful Relationship

Having a proper self-image means having a positive attitude towards yourself and others. It means appreciating your worth while behaving responsibly with those around you. It is more of having self-respect than being self-absorbed. However, just like any other skill, developing a proper self-image also takes time and practice.

Now, how does proper self-image help build a successful relationship? When you have a proper self-image, you are able to display a positive attitude and treat your partner well. Here are some ways that a proper self-image helps build a successful relationship:

  • You don’t criticize, blame, or shame your partner
  • You accept your partner as they are
  • You know how to praise and appreciate your partner genuinely
  • You know that mistakes are part of life and that the important thing is that you are both willing to change

Tips to Develop a Proper Self-Image

You first have to change the way you think about yourself before you can change your circumstances. Positive thinking helps you see yourself honestly and accept and love yourself. It helps you remove your internal barriers so you can start doing your best.

Here are some tips to develop a positive self-image:

  • Shake off negative thoughts
  • Highlight your strengths and assets
  • Accept your flaws and mistakes then move on and correct them
  • Encourage yourself more
  • Accept that some things are beyond your control
  • Be kind to yourself
  • Take a break regularly so you don’t feel burnt out
  • Believe that you can do the things you pray for
  • Learn to forgive and forget

You see, when you have a proper self-image, you see the person you love the same way you see yourself. And this is what helps build a successful relationship. Of course, on top of it all, putting God at the center of your relationship is truly what will make it successful.